Lessons learned…

Wow, I hope you all have had an amazing Christmas. It was a wonderful Christmas for our family. It was a little too food enjoyable. 🙂 I decided that after 21 months on WW, I needed to take a mental break. I needed to take some time for me. So, with the approval of my doctor and my counselor I began to set up my plan to take my two week hiatus from WW.

Taking my life back one day at a time.

So, how did I set up my hiatus. I set it up by creating accountability partners for myself. I reached out to my WW coach and my accountability partner. I also added several friends to this accountability group. Why did I set up so many accountability partners? Because there is always a chance that their will be one accountability partner not willing to be as strong and encouraging of me to get back on track. I wanted to ensure that I had someone that would be that push. That person that would say Tracy, you need to do this. You promised. Luckily, ALL of my accountability partners were very encouraging to get back on track.

I also set up a deadline. I set up a back on track date. Taking a break from WW and not setting up a get back on date allows you to keep pushing that date back. I needed an accountability to myself. What day did I decide to get back on? Saturday, January 2. And guess what, I was on track that day without a doubt. So, what happened on my two week break?

Continue reading → Lessons learned…

It’s been a minute

Wow, I did not realize how long it has been since I wrote on my blog. I sit here and wonder what got into my way. Then I realize I wrote a number of blogs and just never posted them. I didn’t because when I wrote them I was not in the right frame of mind. I was emotional, I was hurt, or one thing or another and it was not appropriate to post on my blog. So, I apologize for not updating sooner. I promise I am going to get better at this.

Photo by Sharefaith on Pexels.com

This month has been very emotional for me. I have sat and watched our world go crazy here in the United States. I have watched as families get torn apart because of one’s political views. I have watched people I love get hurt by the election. I have seen friends cry their eyes out on video chat because they are so upset. Let me say this before I continue any further. I respect you if you voted for Joe Biden. I respect you if you voted for Donald Trump. I respect you if you voted 3rd party.

Continue reading → It’s been a minute

Weighing in after a disastrous week

So, after the emotional week that I had this week I really did not want to get on the scale. I thought about not doing it. But, I have religiously weighed every Saturday since March 23, 2019. I decided that no matter what I was getting on that scale. Up or down, I needed to know where my balance was. Did I maintain the tools not to put five pounds on this week?

Stepping on the scale is a victory!
Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com
Continue reading → Weighing in after a disastrous week

Depression as a Christian

This post is going to be very very raw. Just because I want to bring awareness to depression and anxiety. I am currently writing an article on what it is like to be a Christian and suffer from both. As I thought about the last month, especially yesterday, I thought I would share the raw with you today. Because yesterday was one of those days that showed the gambit. 

Sometimes in life you get a sucker punch in the gut. That is how I have felt the last month. It’s been extremely rough on me emotionally. Some of y’all know what has been going on, some don’t, but it has been an emotional roller coaster. From moments of sheer bliss to moments I think Jason is literally worried. 

Yesterday, life was fine. Until I received one piece of news – I may be losing one of the links in my chain of support that helps me battle the depression and anxiety. It sent me spiraling to the point I could barely breathe through my tears. My calming mechanisms tried to kick in but they didn’t. I finally sat down next to Jason constantly rocking and crying. He held me and rubbed my back because he knows that calms me down. Jason finally calmed me down enough to be able to take a moment to myself. Jason drew me a bath and I put my peppermint and lavender oils in and I just soaked. 

Jason needed to go pick up a new prescription for my nerve pain. While we were out, he received a call. In that call we found a blessing. The blessing was such that it again sent me into tears, but this time it was tears because I saw God’s grace, mercy, and love. You know the moment I mean when you see God’s hand is in everything and you know you are not on this journey of life alone. That no matter what, you’re loved. 

Last night Jason made me dinner. He made me one of my favorites. Something my WW tracker normally says is Jakie Burgers. He made me homemade fries. (The man can cook.) But, then he just sat with me the rest of the night. I don’t remember what we were even watching on tv to be honest. We sat there and he again rubbed my back so that I could be calm and sleep.

You see depression and anxiety is not from distrust in God or something. It’s that raw real emotion that you get throughout the day. It’s not something to be taken lightly or even blown off. It’s real and it’s here.  

The Best feeling!

I agree 100% with this and what I needed to hear today!

The best feeling in the world is finally knowing that you took step in right direction, a step to the future, a step towards your right goals. When …

The Best feeling!

Weigh In Results for Birthday Week

I don’t always publish my weigh in results on here. But, I felt it was important to do so today.

Losing weight does not mean you have to miss out of things like this!

After my birthday week, I got on the scale today and I was surprisingly down .2 pounds. I am ecstatic about those results. Normally I would be upset I only lost .2. But today was different. I am happy for these results because I had a wonderful birthday. I had the best birthday ever and enjoyed my cupcake.

Losing weight does not have to be about restrictions. While you are losing gift you do not have to forgo indulgences. I love my WW because of that. I get to enjoy my life and enjoy my days.

I for too long have tried to “diet.” Diets do not work. Diets only strict you and the reason people fall off of them is because you can’t live that way your entire life. You have to learn how to enjoy food and live with food for the rest of your life.

Just some food for thought. Hope you all have a blessed week. Looking forward to sharing some amazing news with you soon.

Well, I am 19 (again)

When I was growing up, my birthday’s were some of my happiest memories. I remember my birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese the most, I think. I loved watching the little mice on stage. Every birthday growing up, my parents made it special for me in some way. Oftentimes, we would go out to eat or go do something fun on my birthday if it was on the weekend.

Photo by Jess Bailey Designs on Pexels.com

Now that I have grown up my birthday still means a lot to me because of those memories. But, one thing has changed. Somehow I have stopped aging. By the power of my wonderful Aunt Sam. Every year since I turned 19, I get a “Happy 19th Birthday part ?” I told her when I was in college that I wasn’t going to get any older. And thanks to her I haven’t.

Something as simple as remembering one comment I made on one birthday brings me joy every time I get a card from her. It reminds me how much she loves me to just remember that one thing.

This year’s birthday was a little different, but the love I felt from family and friends was one of the best things I could have asked for amidst COVID-19. It has been a blessing to feel this loved. On my birthday this year, I got a phone call I did not expect. And throughout the afternoon I just felt joy from that phone call. I felt encouraged.

Continue reading → Well, I am 19 (again)

Oh so much has changed

Earlier this year I wrote about opening my very own women’s clothing boutique. After several months of no sales and continuing to spend money on advertising, I decided to close my boutique. I realized that running a clothing boutique in the middle of a pandemic was probably not the smartest thing to do. I admittedly did not know we would still be in a pandemic after 8 months.

Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com

During the last 8 months due to my immunocompromised status, I have not been in a store, a restaurant, gone to church, or seen friends and family. It has been a long 8 months and I fear that it is not going to end at any point soon. The lack of care for others has been heartbreaking to watch. I look at the number of people who refuse to wear a mask, refuse to socially distance and I know it means that I will be in this “prison” of mine for a long time.

So, I have had to come up with something to do with my time. I have had to figure out what is right for me. I will have an announcement soon about my ultimate path, but in the meantime I have found some things that keep me busy. I have become one of those direct sellers people hate on Facebook. I know how people feel about all the social media sellers. But, I have thought about how I want to do my businesses. I am going to stop being the one that always posts sales on my FB feed. I am going to stop being the one that invites people to every page and every group. This is how I am going to be a different direct seller.

Continue reading → Oh so much has changed

Whelp, as predicted…

I got on the scale today and realized that my predictions had come to fruition. I gained 2 lbs because of my emotional eating. I can’t blame anyone but myself. I did it. I own it.

This week I am going to try to find other ways to express my emotions rather than eating food. Maybe you will see me writing more on my blog as a side effect of my avoidance of food.

But, honesty had to win out and I had to post my scale failure.

My baby needed help

Hubs and I decided to get out in the sun a little today. We took a leisurely stroll around our apartment complex. We took our little munchkins because they are just so cute and need to be with me. 🙂

As we were walking around I noticed my little girl was favoring her back right leg. I watched as she moved slower than her brother and also noticed how she had to take a few breaks along the way because of it.

My Sweet Baby Girl Candy

When we got home she laid down and I gently massaged it. I hate when I see her in pain. The arthritis in her hip is getting to her some days. I hated the fact she was in pain.

Continue reading → My baby needed help